Adam Pedley

Have you ever wondered why you are always right. Why no matter what, everything you know right now is correct? When I first considered this, I couldn’t figure out the answer. I just said, well I am right, everyone else is an idiot and moved on. But I imagined a few people might disagree with this so called fact.

Then it came to me. I am right logically, based on all the facts and opinion of reliability of the sources of information I have received. This may be my very logical brain kicking into gear here, so let me explain.

If you want to know the answer to know a question. You have been taught x + y = z, yet someone else has been taught w + x + y = z. You both know you are trying to find the answer of z, but you have both been taught a different way. When discussing your opinion it is rare, you both sit down and determine each bit of information you have been taught, then get your answers to equal.

We don’t like being told we are wrong. I am yet to figure out exactly why, pride, ego, or something biological. Either way, its why they say you are normally a big person to admit you are wrong, as it is hard to do.

The next part of the equation is the the reliability of the source of information. Some people place a lot of trust in what the government says, others do not. And the reliability of the source of information is determined by many factors built up over your life. These include such things as your partners profession and your parents.

But in saying all of this, we only meet people we disagree with, because we want to. And one last thing to remember, a reliable source of information, is from someone who has acheived the result you want to acheive. If you are not where you want to be now, you are not right on many things. If you don’t have the health, or wealth you want, it means the majority of things you know about health or wealth are wrong.

Find someone who has you want to achieve and do what they do.

If you are reading this blog, you are most likely the person who is learning and growing and enjoys doing so. Funnily enough not everyone likes to learn and grow, they become stuck in their ways and think they know it all. Family members seem to be great at this. They are the people in your lives that you can’t naturally move away from. So while you attract others and move away from others in your life, family tends to stay rather constant.

Once you begin to grow and change as a person, conflicts will arise with your famliy. Why? Because you are changing, yet your relationship is still based on the old you and your family members. What I see happen from here, with myself, wife and friends, is that a huge conflict comes about. Words and actions are exchanged that cause normally a huge falling out, that you stop communicating with your family members.

But then what happens (eventually) is that communication is reopened in a new way. You can tell things are different when speaking with them, and you will act differently around each other. While there still may be a few rough patches when you start talking to them again and a possible few more minor conflicts, generally you will all accept each other for who you all are now.

Don’t think of this falling out as a huge catastrophy. You are still family, if you were in real trouble they would help, just as you would help if your other family member was in trouble. The bond still remains, just accept things will now be different, you have grown. This isn’t a bad thing, it’s just different.

Parents and older family members will always assume that they know more than you, because they are older and they raised you from a child and you will most likely assume you know more, as most people (including me) tend to think like that. Now in reality, older family members will have more life experience and know things that you don’t, but if you are continually learning and growing you will end up being wiser than them and knowing more things (although possibly different things) than them. Will they ever accept this, not likely, as especially if they are your parents, they raised you from a child, and in their eyes taught you how to be like you are today.

While they did teach you alot, and be grateful for that, you will learn things from other people and sources and if you are proactive, you will know more than them in many ways. An interesting saying I have heard is “if the son wasn’t smarter than the father, then we would all still be living in caves.” Whether you believe in evolution or religion, each generation (with possibly the exception of todays young generation ) is getting smarter.

Connecting with people is one of the fundamentals of being human. We all connect with people, its in our nature. So how does this connection work? My understanding comes to the commonalities between people.

When people first meet, people will make small talk about such questions as where they work and what their hobbies are, anything to try and find a common ground. If one is found the conversation will expand to include more about personal opinions on the common interest.

From here it is common values or beliefs that will decide on whether they become friends or aquaitences.

Now have you ever admired a person or found traits in person irritating or anything along those lines. Well, say hello to everything you admire about yourself, desire to be or dislike about yourself. You like to project yourself on to others, as I do as well. It’s not a bad thing, its great as it shows you who you are.

So what if you want to have a relationship, friendship with someone else. Be an equal!

What are the values that you admire in the person. Make these values your own. Values and beliefs can be difficult to change if you belief they are. If you want to have a relationship with a person at least one core value or belief must be a match. To have a deeper relationship multiple core values and beliefs must be a match.

One interesting thing you might notice is that once you change a core belief or value to one that you admire, people who have that core belief or value will surround you.

So right now, write down a core value or belief you wish to have and believe it. If you don’t know google on how you can do it. And once its changed, watch your equals surround you.